New Normals

As I write this post, I’m a bit hesitant. I am definitely entering a new normal, but the key word is “entering”. I’m transitioning from illness to wellness, from being sequestered and guarded to showing up in public places. I’m growing stronger each day, but definitely still evolving. I’m guessing there will come a time in the months ahead where I can feel like I’ve really landed in a new season. 

But with all of that said, I am confidently walking towards a chapter that closes the door on some of the heaviness, difficulties, and uncertainties of the last 6 months. And yes, it feels really good to do that! 

Some of you may be coming into a new normal season as well. Maybe you are shedding off an illness as I am, or perhaps your new normal is a recent diagnosis. Maybe you have lost a spouse or another loved one. It could be that you’ve moved to a new city or taken a new job. If you’re reading this post, I have no doubt you’ve experienced new normals in your lifetime, whether this is the moment or not. 

Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven”. The chapter then goes on to illustrate this concept with phrases like, There is a time to be born, a time to die, a time to plant, a time to uproot, etc. New seasons can be exciting, and they can also hold pockets of uncertainty. What is ahead? How will I need to adapt? Am I ready for this next era in my life? 

If I had asked myself those questions on December 4, 2025 when Dick and I were confronted with the news of an ovarian cancer diagnosis, I’m sure I would have had some initial feelings of uncertainty and trepidation. Let me re-word that. Though I wasn’t asked those questions directly I did have feelings of uncertainty and trepidation. But I can honestly say – and Dick and I have discussed this at length – we felt so assured of God’s sovereignty that we were able to run to the many battles ahead. None of this was a surprise to Him. At all! The Lord comforted us, strengthened us, directed us, assured us, and shepherded us with every step. 

Before reading further, let me clarify. This doesn’t mean we smiled all the way through the last 182 or so days. There were hard moments. There were days I needed lots of encouragement and hope. There were sick days, fatigued days, and battle-weary days when God would graciously lean in a little closer and/or send a family member or friend to be “Jesus with skin on”. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU to all who have sent a card, a gift, a text, made a phone call, visited, posted on Facebook or on this blog. Every single solitary gesture of love has been seen and appreciated by Mel and Dick Tunney! 

One of my new normals is having the opportunity to be with our family after 6+ very long months. Yes, I was grateful for many Facetime calls. But that’s NOT the same as being together. So far, we’ve been able to connect with 4 of our 10 grands. We’ll see our other 6 in a few weeks. Here is a moment I’ll always treasure. (Note that I still have a bandage on my arm from a blood draw earlier that day. Still in process, but so thankful to be able to be with precious family members.)

A few weeks ago on a Friday night, Dick and I went to downtown Bowling Green and were able to walk around and enjoy two free outdoor concerts about 4-5 blocks away from each other. The weather was perfect, the cover bands playing songs from the 70’s, 80’s and 90’s were fun to listen to, food trucks were in abundance, kids were running around, frisbees and footballs were sailing across the fields . . . and I found myself thinking, “I’m here! I’m not isolated at home! Wow, this is amazing!” It’s funny, but I’m still having to reassure myself that it’s okay for me to be out in the world again. Another new normal. 

There are other “every day” new normals I’m experiencing. 

• My hair is continuing to grow back – slow, but sure. (And that goes for eyebrows and eyelashes as well). I’ll probably be wearing a wig when I leave the house for the next few months. There’s something vulnerable about having a wig sitting on what you know is a pretty bare head. My new normal goal is to walk around church, Aldi, or a park and “forget” I have on a wig. I’m probably more self-aware than I need to be. (I am learning to style my wigs better. The main photo on this post is one where I seem to look the most like “myself”).

• The neuropathy (a tingling sensation) in my fingers and the balls of my feet continues to be an issue. I do believe it’s getting better – thank you to all who have prayed for that. And there are times when my mind turns it off and it’s less noticeable. 

I sense God will be opening new doors for ministry in the days ahead, though I honestly have no clue what those might look like. It’s interesting, but one of the passages that has held the deepest comfort for me during my cancer journey is found in Isaiah 43:

“But now, this is what the Lord says – he who created you, Jacob, he who formed you, Israel: ‘Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.’” (Isaiah 43:1-3a)

But if you read further into Isaiah 43, this is what you find:

“This is what the Lord says – he who made a way through the sea, a path through the mighty waters, who drew out the chariots and horses, the army and reinforcements together, and they lay there, never to rise again, extinguished, snuffed out like a wick: ‘Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.’”  (Isaiah 43:16-19)

I’ve not ever connected the dots in this chapter to understand: 

1. God is with us in the waters, the rivers, and the fire. 
2. Then He leads us out of those calamities and reminds us of how He alone has made the way through these obstacles. 
3. And then after that, He blesses with something new – a new chapter, a new season. 

I have no clue what the “new things” are the Lord is preparing for my days ahead. A quick aside here: About 5 years ago, I signed up with Indeed.com to receive emails now and then on various jobs that might fit my skill set. Though I haven’t needed any of their expertise in the last years, every now and then I’ll get a notice for a church position or something else that lines up with the initial information on myself that I submitted. The other day, I received a notice for something completely outside my abilities or interests.

Hmmm . . . I’m pretty sure this won’t be my new normal. Maybe it’s time to unsubscribe. 😊

After my surgery back in March, I remember the doctor coming by on day #2. I was laying flat on my back, lethargic, and in some pain. He examined the large scar on my chest, checked my vitals, and then said, “A goal for you today would be to sit up in bed and dangle your legs off to the side. Then if you’re able, go and sit in the recliner for 5 minutes.” Even as I type this, I scratch my head in amazement at how I wasn’t able to accomplish either of those tasks on that day! Whenever I would raise my head, a feeling of lightheadedness combined with heavy fatigue would come over me. I was grateful for a catheter that had been placed during surgery so I wouldn’t have to leave the bed for any reason. Fast forward to now . . . I’m walking around Mammoth Cave and downtown Bowling Green with confidence. Not 100% endurance, but confidence nonetheless. A new normal is beginning. 

Whatever my next season looks like, I have no doubt that the last 6 months of my life will impact what’s ahead and be significant in how the Lord chooses to use me. Nothing, no part of our story, is wasted. Every piece – the fun parts, the hard parts, the confusing parts, the scary parts – are purposeful, to make us more like Jesus. Oh, how important that is to remember! One of my heroes in the faith, Corrie ten Boom, said it well –

“Every experience God gives us, every person he puts in our lives is the perfect preparation for the future that only he can see”.
(Corrie ten Boom)

May the fourth verse of this familiar hymn be my prayer, and yours as we enter seasons of new normals:

Have thine own way, Lord, have thine own way
Hold o’er my being absolute sway.
Fill with thy Spirit till all shall see
Christ only, always, living in me!