Hope

“We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield.” (Psalm 33:20)

“May your unfailing love be with us, Lord, even as we put our hope in you.” (Psalm 33:22)

“Hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.” (Romans 8:24-25)

“That is why we labor and strive, because we have put our hope in the living God, who is the Savior of all people, and especially of those who believe.” (1 Timothy 4:10)

And one of my favorites right now . . .

“He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us again. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.” (2 Corinthians 1:10-11)

Part of the purpose of each post in this blog format is to “preach the truth to myself”. If you just read the above verses, you’re watching that at work. As I type each word of these scriptures (and you’ll notice some are emboldened – that’s intentional, for my heart to hear), the truths are cemented deeper inside me as I approach one of the biggest challenges I’ve ever faced. It’s not that I’ve just sailed through life up until now, easily with no problems. Not at all. But this upcoming surgery is proving to be an event that requires daily . . . no, really minute-by-minute confirmation of the hope I have by trusting Jesus for every outcome. 

Dick and I were talking about the word “hope” and how vital it is to a diagnosis like mine. I’ve mentioned before the differences of people in an Oncology waiting room. While, of course, I want to give much grace for some who just don’t feel well, there can often be such a contrast of those with hope, and those without. I’m also aware that a reason for “no hope” may be because some of the people in these chairs do not know Jesus. With absolute truth and conviction, I can say that I would not be able to walk this road without Him. No exaggeration. 

In the times I get discouraged or afraid – and I do – the Lord gently pulls me close to Him through His word, through a friend, through a song . . . 

Sometimes just looking out the window at the beauty of creation turns my heart away from the details and decisions that always seem to be in front of me. John Piper said this: “One of the great enemies of hope is forgetting God’s promises”. So very true. Opening God’s Word and letting it bring comfort, strength, and hope is the best way to remove fear. 

I mentioned songs. Music speaks to my heart in a profound way. Being a songwriter myself, I have always been pretty meticulous with word choices in the lyrics I’ve been a part of. I did a quick look some of my favorite worship songs, and even if it isn’t the complete focus of the song, I found the word “hope” all over the place:

In Christ alone, my hope is found . . .

Declaring there is hope and there is freedom, I speak Jesus . . . 

In the darkness we were waiting without hope, without light
Till from Heaven You came running, there was mercy in Your eyes . . . 

There’s salvation in Your name, Jesus Christ, my Living Hope . . . 

So teach my song to rise to You when temptation comes my way
And when I cannot stand, I’ll fall on You. Jesus, You’re my hope and stay . . .

To this I hold, my hope is only Jesus . . . 

And of course, an oldie, but such a goodie – 

My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness
I dare not trust the sweetest frame, but wholly lean on Jesus’ name
On Christ, the Solid Rock I stand. All other ground is sinking sand. 

I’m grateful music can be carried with us anytime, anyplace. Dick is currently working on a piano playlist he is arranging, playing, and recording just for me. I gave him a list of many of my favorite hymns/worship songs, and as he is creating this, there are times I can hear through the walls of our home a melody that I know is going to brighten our next week ahead. (I’m trying not to listen too close, as I want to have a small element of surprise.) This, my friends, is a benefit of being married to my talented, creative husband. 😀 And this music will bring truth and hope into our hospital room. 

Last night before we went to sleep, Dick and I asked the question, Knowing what is ahead next week, what are we hoping and praying for?

Here were a few things that were mentioned:
Physical healing – all of the cancer to be removed by the surgeon, NEVER to return
Recovery to be without complications
No surprises
Pain to be manageable

And how can we even ask for these things? Because there are some foundations that, as believers in Jesus, we KNOW. We can be assured of these truths:
God loves us
Nothing is impossible for Him
He never leaves us or forsakes us
God is pure mercy, compassion, and goodness
He is the God who sees
He is the Great Physician, Jehovah Rapha, our Healer

I could go on and on and on. But I’ll stop there, as these are specific elements of His character that have been amplified to us in this season. Because of these truths, we can absolutely have hope.

Remember when I mentioned “preaching to myself”? Well, bear with me. Here I go again. 

Dick and I are reading a wonderful daily devotional on the Psalms called In the Lord I Take Refuge by Dane Ortlund. Yesterday we read Psalm 43, which many will say is a continuation of Psalm 42. There are 3 verses that are identical in both Psalms, and I want to not only close this post with them, but use them to set the tone for my surgery in a few days. Here’s the verse: 

“Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” (Psalm 42:5, 11; Psalm 43:5)

Several quick gleanings . . . 

1. When you are walking through any significant challenge (and we all are, or will be), there are two postures of our flesh that seem to naturally slip in. The first is discouragement – Why is this happening? How am I going to get through it? This is too big for me to fight! And the second can be turmoil, disturbance, or restlessness – How is this going to work out? What do I need to do?  How can I fix this? These exact feelings are what the Psalmist is experiencing, as he is downcast and disturbed.
2. As the Psalmist speaks these words to himself, here’s his solution: “Self, put your hope in God! Praise Him in the midst of the trial.” (James 1:2-3) And sometimes, we also need to preach that wisdom to ourselves.
3. Finally, the Psalmist calls on two distinct facets of God:
   Savior – the word used signifies “help, deliverance, victory” over my “face, health, countenance”.  And God – the word used is “Elohim”, God of ALL gods.
   Both are needed when our circumstances are most difficult. 

The Amplified translation really lays this out well – “Why are you in despair, O my soul? And why are you restless and disturbed within me? Hope in God and wait expectantly for Him, for I shall again praise Him, the help of my [sad] countenance and my God.”

In a few days, I will be wheeled into a room filled with very capable, learned men and women (doctors, nurses, anesthesiologists, other medical personnel) who, certainly, I am entrusting with the next steps to rid my body of this disease. Dick and I are daily lifting them up to the Lord. 

But the better news? And the way I will run towards this battle in full assurance – not downcast or disturbed within me? I have put my hope in GOD. 

Chosen. 

God is my Shamar.

Marching FORTH. 

Not downcast. Not disturbed. Resting in . . . hope. 

Thank you for your prayers in this journey! 

 “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope, by the power of the Holy Spirit”. (Romans 15:13)

P.S. – In this post photo, I’m wearing a shirt given to me by a friend in the early parts of this journey. I have no idea what Vera Wang meant by this phrase when she designed this t-shirt, but for me it has significant meaning. Hope. Grows. Here. 

The hope I have in Christ is indeed growing (stronger and deeper) – particularly as I immerse myself in His word – and it’s growing “here”, in my heart and spirit. 

P.S. – One more detail. If you zoom in tight on this photo, you will see a few hair strands coming out of the bottom of the beanie. These are lovingly called . . . “wisps of hope”. 👩🏻